"Are you related to the bride?"

Really, getting a marriage license in New Jersey is quite the exercise in silliness.

Ed and I planned on heading to the borough hall Monday, when we were both off, to take care of this business quickly. Not so fast. You need an appointment. And a witness. And no, the clerk is not a witness.

Luckilly, Rebecca so graciously agreed to stand up for us (my mom and sisters both had dress fittings). So we sat down with the clerk, and on came the dumb questions:

To Ed: "Are you currently married? Do you have a venerial disease? Are you related to the bride?"

I guess Rebecca's purpose is to make sure we don't lie about the above? Though really, what's to stop us from making everything up?

I found the last question especially intriguing, so I decided to go home and do some research. Apparently our fine state - along with many others - allow first cousin marriages.

First cousin. Only a handful of states say no to this, or require "genetic counseling" in order to go through with it.

um?

So, we finished this creepy line of questioning, and now must wait three days for our license. Three days for a license that doesn't even require a blood test. Even the clerk agreed it's dumb.

Meanwhile, we could hop a plane to Vegas, hit up a drive through chapel, and be done with it before the "processing" is even finished in our home state. Whatever.